Guest post from adoptive mother Jane: In 1 Samuel 16:7 we learn “Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” When our hearts soften to the idea of adoption, we realize that love is not based on biological connection, or attractiveness or skin color. God opens our eyes to a bigger world, where family is not who you are, but what you do! Love and relationship trumps all, when God is in the mix!
When I think about my husband and my close friends, it feels as if time has stood still. When I look at them, I see who they are inside and the wonderful times we have spent together. I don’t see the wrinkles and obvious signs of age, because I see their heart. I love them for who they are and not their outward appearance.
God sees each of us with ultimate clarity. He loves our spirit and our heart. Our exterior is a shell God looks past to our true essence. He connects with the part of us that will never die; the part that will join our Heavenly Father in His wonderful kingdom! God sees what we can be!
When your heart is open to God’s plan, anything is possible! He has a child picked out for your family. He can see beyond the superficial to the tender heart beneath. God wants to bring into your life a child that will complement the unique needs and characteristics of your family. Do you trust God enough to lay your family at His feet?
“Blessed are the pure in heart,
For they shall see God.”
It is heartwarming to see the flood of families that have been called to adoption these past few months. With the downturn in the economy, added pressures have overwhelmed many young birth moms. At an increasing rate, they are choosing to find adoptive families for their babies, rather than face the seemingly insurmountable struggle of trying to raise a child without resources and support. Because of this, Christian adoption centers such as Lifetime Adoption are constantly looking for couples to match with birth moms that have decided to step out in faith and start the adoption process.
You were created to make a difference! Only the Lord knows His mighty plans for you. If He has weighed you down with a desire that you can’t seem to shake, then it is time to stop and ask the Lord to reveal His plan. Taking a chance and stepping out of one’s comfort zone it not an easy thing to do! It requires trust in our Heavenly Father and trust in our ability to hear His call.
Maybe you have struggled to give birth to a child for so long, that you are ready to walk away from your dream of being a parent all together. You feel as if you have no control over your body and your life. Well, this is the year of the Lord’s favor! In Isaiah 61:2-3, God reminds us that He will comfort those who mourn and create beauty out of ashes. He goes on to declare that He will plant great works in you so His kingdom will be glorified.
Do not lose heart! You were meant to read this at these particular cross roads in your life. You were destined to hear these words for a reason. Are you meant to parent through the wonderful process of adoption? Ask the Lord for His answer and He will make it clear to you. There is an old saying that God’s Light shines brighter in the darkness. Can you see it?
For anyone thinking about building a family through adoption, Lifetime Adoption’s Webinars will feature questions from families in all stages of exploring or pursuing adoption.
By signing up and joining in on Lifetime’s webinars, you will be able to ask your questions and discover answers that will help you decide the next best step toward building your family. Please join us for your opportunity to participate in Lifetime’s most popular resource for families thinking about adopting.
When you register you’ll receive an email with the link or phone number you’ll need to join us live.
You may attend by PHONE or ONLINE from a computer, or your Smart Phone. To attend using your iPhone or Droid download a free webinar app. (Please refer to your personal data plan to find out if charges may apply to attend from your cell phone using this app.)
We’re looking forward to your questions!
Knowledge is power. Information is liberating. Education is the premise of progress, in every society, in every family
– Kofi Annan
We’re familiar with the phrase ‘knowledge is power’. Truth be told, while we are familiar with this adage, we often forget to apply it in our everyday lives. This is especially true when it comes to reading and understanding important documents and contracts. We just run through the pages or give a cursory glance at the contents, before signing on the dotted line. Some don’t even do that!
The adoption process can be quite challenging and time-consuming. The prospective parents have only one thing on their mind – to bring their baby home. And that’s perfectly natural. Couples who have gone through unsuccessful assisted reproductive treatments like IUI, IVF, or ICSI suddenly have the hope of bringing home a baby of their own. They are excited and anxious at the same time and their emotions are understandable. But, the adoption process is pretty vigorous. It requires couples to spend time with the agency and the adoption professionals, as well as reading through the adoption contract to understand the terms of the adoption process.
If you have trouble paying attention to anything in print, you may have to take it up with your school! From grade school to college, many students just go through the motions of reading and writing, creating a veritable treasure trove of disinformation: a) In Guinessis, the first book of the Bible, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. B) Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten commandments; he died before he ever reached Canada c) Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock d) History calls people Romans because they never stayed in one place for very long. e) The pyramids are a range of mountains between France and Spain. While it may be very funny to read, we can all learn something from this – we must spend time in preparation when we are faced with life-changing decisions and we surely need to pay attention to what we read!
If your adoption is not complete and you have not read your adoption contract yet, I strongly recommend picking it up right now and spending time reading it. Don’t try to read it in between work or when you are mentally occupied with other things. You have to be mentally present when you read the contract. Ensure that both you and your spouse understand the entire terms of the adoption contract. A poorly read contract may cause you a lot of confusion and frustration in your adoption journey. If you have any doubts or questions, get in touch with your adoption professional. It is always better to be safe than sorry!
Our children are not ours because they share our genes…
they are ours because we have had the audacity to envision them.
That, at the end of the day…or long sleepless night,
is how love really works.
Are you afraid of open adoption? Do you think it is not only uncomfortable but also unbiblical? Well, I want to share what I found in the Word of God. Before we find instances of open adoption in the Bible, you must understand that adoption is pleasing in God’s sight. There are many examples of Biblical characters encouraging and demonstrating adoption: The adoption of Moses by Pharaoh’s daughter, the adoption of Esther by her relative Mordecai after the death of her parents, and finally, Joseph’s adoption of Jesus as his own child. Apart from these people adopting children who are not biologically theirs, the Bible says we are the children of God through adoption. In fact the New Testament (Gal. 4:3–7; Eph. 1:1–6) describes the believer’s relationship with God through adoption. So, it is very clear that adoption is divinely authorized and has the blessing of God, our Maker.
But, what does the Bible have to say about open adoption? Well, Joseph’s adoption of Jesus is a beautiful example of this process. He welcomed Jesus as his own, even though Jesus was conceived by the power of the Holy Spirit. He recognized him as his own son and have him all legal rights, including the claim to the Davidic family line. When Jesus was 12 years old, he wandered away from his parents during the Passover Feast in Jerusalem, and was found three days later in the temple talking to the teachers. When he was questioned by his mother, he replies, “Why did you seek Me? Did you not know that I must be about My Father’s business?” Now, no adoptive parent would want to hear something like this. We can only imagine how Joseph felt when Jesus calls God as His ‘father’. The Bible indicates that Jesus spent time alone in prayer, communicating with His Father God. Joseph could have allowed himself to get upset about this. But, he did not allow this kind of open communication with Jesus’ heavenly Father to sour his relationship with his adopted son. We read that Jesus was ‘subject’ to his parents as He grew in wisdom and stature (Luke 2:51). So, He enjoyed a close relationship with his earthly parents, while communing with His Father in Heaven.
Can we do the same with an open adoption? Yes, we can. The focus of the adoption process should be the child. Your child’s birth family is very much a part of his or her life, whether you like it or not. An open adoption will remove feelings of insecurity and abandonment in your child that comes from not knowing anything about the birth family or not having any contact with them. It is your responsibility to allow your child to have a healthy communication channel with his or her birth family. If you fear complications from it, allow God to remove those fearful thoughts from your mind. Trust in Him and ask Him for the grace you need to opt for an open adoption.